the things my kids say

I bet you are saying, "I think she's chewing on wheat grass" and you know what? You would be right!

So I keep a journal, I have since Jon was about 15 months old, it started off so I could chronicle the cute things he did and inevitably the crappy things too -like biting. That sucked. Since then, it has evolved into something more. It was my place to vent when I was angry or sad or jealous or happy. I was able in detail to describe caring for my mom and ultimately her last days and losing her. On a happier note, it also has been a place to record my kids achievements, good things in my life, exciting moments and things I am proud of. Sometimes life is a bit hectic, so I don't write in it everyday. When those times happen, I try to, at least once a month recap. It has also become commonplace for Ryan or I to say - "that needs to go in the journal" when the kids say or do something particularly hilarious. I thought I would share some of those with you. Surprise, surprise, Drew seems to be the king of commentary these days. He really does have wit beyond his years. His latest and best as far as I'm concerned was earlier last week. It was a warm day outside and he was playing in the driveway with Penny. I was not busy in the kitchen and was paying complete attention to his and her every move. It was then that he called in and asked for a popsicle. I yelled out to him that I didn't have any popsicle and that I would get some next time at the store. His response was, "C'mon Woman!" in a very impatient tone. Now I find this particularly funny because normally my children say things that are direct copies of what I normally say. But this one, this one is all Ryan's. As you can imagine I am a goddess of a wife, but on occasion, a rare one, I may frustrate him a tad. His response is a usual "Woman!" I don't take insult to this at all because frankly he's been calling me that for over 15 years now, so it's almost like my name. The best part of this story is that I was on the phone with Ryan when he did it - I think Ryan might have fallen out of his desk chair from laughter.

The next installment is my darling Jon. Jon has had some humdingers in his short life, this one is a recent reply after a particularly long and hard swim practice. My son tried out and made the swim club and they work this boy hard! The good news his he is improving like you wouldn't believe, the bad news, this is all very new so while his freestyle and backstroke and even his breaststroke are improving, at this point his butterfly looks more like a seizure than an actual swim stroke. I have to admit, that at first I sat near the sheppard's hook, "just to be safe." Fortunately we've never needed it and after swimming for two months on the team, he really is getting it and doing well. Which brings me back to our tough practice. Jon has a tendency to be a bit gloomy if things don't go as he's planned. So when I said, "hey buddy, you did great, you are improving so much! don't worry about your butterfly, you'll get it." his reply was, "that's a bunch of crap mom." Yeah, that ones all mine. I would love to tell you that I am not the mom yelling at the top of my lungs to "pick your crappy toys", unfortunately on my worst days I am. I should know better, I should, because while I'm saying "pick up your crappy toys" all my boys hear is "crap, crap, crap, crappy, crap." They just have a knack for honing in on the one totally inappropriate thing you've said. We all have our thing - crap is mine. And now Jon's apparently. As a good parent, I stifled my laughter and explained that while I may say that word, he can't, ever, or he'll go to the bad boys home. Which is a whole other post. That threat seemed sufficient and we've haven't had a "crappy" incident since.

While Penny is beginning to talk, it's the looks she gives that are far better. If looks could kill, I'd be a goner and so would her brothers. I am in Trouble with a capital "T" and it might rhyme with "P", but it doesn't spell Pool. (Like that old school movie reference?) But while she isn't mouthing off - she does have some pretty cute mispronunciations, like - Oh my dosh. Which is pretty obvious - but it doesn't stop me from asking her to say it a few times each day for a pick me up. Who doesn't like a little hit of "Oh my dosh?"

She might look like this...

but she has a tendency to act more like this...

See I know there are more, but I can't remember them all. My mind is a fog of useless information right now - thank goodness for my journal!

Thanks!